Dan Patrick Vacationed in Montana… Fortunately, Didn’t Encounter a Bear

One of my all-time favorite sports broadcasting personalities Dan Patrick was in Montana last week on vacation.

Fun fact that has nothing to do with the story: I met Dan Patrick in Minneapolis at Super Bowl LII. He was a great dude. 

The former Sportscenter anchor (he's en fuego) and current host of the Dan Patrick Show spent almost 10 minutes Monday morning discussing the outdoors in Montana, what to do if you come across a bear and harsh Montana winters.

By the way, if you haven't listened to the Dan Patrick Show do yourself a favor and check them out. You can listen to Dan and his cohort of goofballs on KGRZ 1450 AM and 92.7 FM.

Dan Patrick: Elite Outdoorsman

Patrick stayed in the Butte area last week on a fishing trip. He had an outdoors guide who lived a rugged lifestyle, just a tad different than the Milford, Connecticut lifestyle DP is used to.

"Our guide was one of those guys who lives in a small house. Where he cuts his own firewood. He'll go out and hunt elk in the winter, he'll dress and it and bring it back and that's his food for the winter. Like a real, real man," Patrick said on the DP Show.

It didn't sound like DP had much knowledge of the rugged lifestyle. The guide, named Kelly, told him a story about being chased by a bear, and all Kelly had on him was a bow and arrow. Patrick could barely comprehend it.

"You know it's weird, like how was your day today, hon? 'I got chased by a bear but I didn't use the bow and arrow. How was yours? Great, I went to Taco Bell, went to Bed Bath & Beyond," Patrick joked.

No encounters with wildlife

Fortunately for Patrick, he didn't encounter a bear. If he had, it could've been an ugly scene.

"I am not a man. I would have cried," said Patrick. "Cuz I don't know how bears react if you get in the fetal position and cry."

Dan Patrick Show producer Paulie Pabst came up with a hilarious idea: a flipchart for encountering different animals (wolves, mountain lions, bears, etc.).

"I would have on my wrist like quarterbacks do," joked Patrick.

It probably wouldn't help you in the wild but I found it to be hilarious.

Good advice from a caller

A caller from Texas dialed in and offered some great advice to the guys differentiating your response against black, brown or polar bears.

"If it's black, fight back. If it's brown, you lay down. If it's white say goodnight cuz you're not going to make it."

I hadn't heard that saying before but I'll use it moving forward.Anyways, Dan I hope you had a great time in Montana.

First time, long time. 5'9, 145 (DING)