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How to Piss Off Someone From Montana in Five Easy Steps

Blue Mountain
Photo courtesy of Sarah Yovetich

A recent study from the Matador Network looked at a few reasons as to what really grinds Montanans’ gears. This is only a few of them, and I can’t disagree with many of them. Any true Montana blood out there? Do you agree? Comment below.


Driving a Car

1

Move Here

 

 

Montana has been labeled as “The Last Best Place” for a reason, right? We’ve seen all the bumper stickers… “Montana is full, get out.” And let’s not even talk about what Montanans think of Californians moving here. Matador wants to put it in easy terms for you. “The first thing Montanans hate: Move here and try to turn Montana into the place you just came from.” After the Treasure State hit one million in population, many credited that historic day as a rather sad one. Montana is full of history, nevertheless, and we wish to keep it that way, nature included. Montana is Montana, not Denver or Seattle. Was that a stretch? Oh well, either way.

 

horses thinkstock

2

Act Like We’re Stuck in the 1800s

 

 

I don’t know how many times I’ve been asked if I ride my horse to school. Am I really a true Montanan if I’ve only ridden a horse a handful of times? We aren’t all cowboys here, I promise. And yes, we do have electricity. “Our toilets do indeed flush,” Matador said. We even get to screen the latest blockbuster movies! And in IMAX BIG D! HOW COOL IS THAT?!

 

Wildflowers Bloom On First Day Of Summer After Record Rainy Winter

3

Ask About All of the Trucks

 

 

Montanans aren’t really considered rednecks, just because there are so many trucks here. What else are we going to drive when 12 inches of snow hits? I, for one, don’t wish to drive a BMW in those conditions. Needless to say, Matador suggested “many of these big pickups that are driven around Montana would give your average Texan a run for their money.” It’s not just good traction they’re used for either. A lot of people I know have huge ranches equipped with cattle and horses. You definitely can’t get your average ranch work done without a diesel, let me tell you.

 

Gun in pants

4

Question Our Gun Ownership

 

 

Hands down, one in three Montanans own a gun. And yes, they know how to use them, and use them safely. Matador said “Montana is probably one of the safest places you’ll ever be so stop acting shocked and worried because these aren’t the guns or the people you need to worry about.” They also suggest that “[Montana’s] murder rate is consistently in the bottom 10 states.” Bottom line, if you see a gun in someone’s vehicle, don’t be alarmed. I can all but guarantee that isn’t there to kill you… unless you magically transform into a whitetail deer or gigantic elk during hunting season.

 

Blue Mountain-Lolo National Forest FB

5

Imply There is Nothing to do Here

 

 

Really? Have you looked outside? At least once a week you can find me hiking up the Blue Mountain Trailhead. One of the most popular spots year around to sight-see and hike is at Logan Pass in Glacier National Park. “Take a tour through Lewis & Clark Caverns or even stroll along the Clark Fork River in downtown Missoula,” Matador suggests. “Go skiing at one of the 15 ski areas in the state.” Catch a fish with Charene the Adventure Queen from KYSS FM (but don’t forget to snap a pic… Apparently that’s the only evidence you have these days to prove you actually fish in Montana). I mean, it’s called Big Sky Country for a reason. It’s hard to say no to a place where beauty surrounds you every which way.

 

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